In a move that’s being widely hailed as a victory for democracy and free speech, a Bangalore man has filed an RTI petition demanding to know if such a thing as the state government of Karnataka exists or not. Mr. Satish Kumar, 48, who works at a public sector bank, said, “I could have sworn that we had an election around here recently. I also have fuzzy memories of walking towards the election booth and casting my vote. And soon after, I read in the newspapers about some party winning the elections and someone being sworn in as the Chief Minister. The funny thing is that I am now not able to say with certainty if any of these things actually happened or if I’ve dreamt them up. I’m a little worried that I’m not able to tell if there is a government or not.”
After a brief emotional pause, Mr. Kumar added, “I know it sounds crazy. This happens to me every five years or so. Although I have distinct memories of voting, I don’t have any recollections of seeing a government actually function in this state. I hope that I am not hallucinating or something. So I have filed an RTI petition to find out.”
When asked to which government he was planning to submit this petition, Mr. Kumar became flustered and incoherent. “I mean, there’s got to be someone who knows this, right? Are you telling me that there is no government anywhere in India which actually exists to which I can turn for answers?” he stammered as he placed a helmet over his head, kick started the scooter and hurriedly left the scene.
In other news, Jagmohan Dalmiya has promised a thorough probe into the spot fixing scandal that has recently rocked IPL. Mr. Dalmiya read out a brief statement to the press in which he said, “I’m confident that we will get to the bottom of this and unearth all the wrong doings that have been perpetrated by Sharad Pawar.”
With contributions from @wabbster on Twitter.
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